Week 3 = Frustration, Embarassment.

It's almost week 3 (day 14) and my face is a mess. I think it's misleading when people call this period the "initial breakout"...it makes it sound like it comes and goes in a few days. No. For me at least, I can tell I'm going to continue to break out for the next few weeks. From now on, I'm calling it the "worse-before-better" phase, or WBB. But the pimples keep on coming and going so it seems that I'm moving through this phase at an okay pace.

Changes to my Skin
My skin has continued to breakout just as it was last week. Most days I wake up with one or two new pustules/white heads, my least favorite kind of pimple because they're so hard (if not impossible) to camouflage or ignore. Sometimes I even acquire a new blemish or two throughout the day. They tend to come to a head within hours, pop within a day when I wash my face, scab over, and stay inactive flat bumps for days and days. They also hurt and itch A LOT, especially along my jawline. My breakouts seem to be moving around my face, one section at a time. Although I have bumps everywhere, the major ones started out on my right cheek/jawline, then those started to heal and I got a bunch on my left cheek/jawline, then those started to heal and they returned to my right cheek/jawline, now my forehead is the most outrageous. I guess I can be happy that my entire face isn't breaking out all at once, but it is really frustrating and embarrassing to face the world looking like this - especially since it's summer and there's so much going on =/

My skin seems a little less oily over the last few days, but still appears shiny a lot of the time. I'm switching to Olay Complete Sensitive Skin Moisturizer with SPF 15, cause I think the Neutrogena lotion I've been using makes me look greasy. I have started to have flakiness on my chin, corners of my mouth and nose, and on the bridge of my nose. When you look closely, you can see that's it's not peeling, it's each and every pore expelling a single flake of oil! Ew. Moisturizer doesn't help. It looks like one of those old school plastic travel brushes that pops in and out! I've continued to wear a small amount of foundation and some concealer most days, but it's starting to not look so hot with all the shit going on. Hopefully I can stay patient and keep my head up as my skin pushes out all the gunk in the next few weeks...

Side Effects
Most of the side effects I spoke of last week are gone. But this is what I'm experiencing this week:

Dry Ass Lips
The dry ass lips continue. I'm still using Aquaphor constantly and my lips have remained smooth and supple, thank you very much! Not a crack or peel in sight. If I get caught up in something and don't put it on for even 30 minutes, they start feeling like straight up crocodile skin. But I've stayed on top of it.

"The itchies"
I have experienced what I call "the itchies." I'll feel like my scalp itches, then my arm, then my side, then my leg, etc. and I can never pinpoint the exact itch or relieve it. Makes you feel like a damn crack head! But I don't get it a lot, so it hasn't been a big deal. My scalp also continues to be mildly itchy.

Dry eyes
My eyes still get mildly dry and itchy, especially when I shower. I don't know why that is...but I've gotten in the habit of putting in eye drops in the morning, night, and maybe once during the day.

Dry Mouth/Thirst
Still drinking as much water as I can. I can tell when I don't get enough my lips feel drier. But it hasn't been hard to drink a lot since I'm always slightly thirsty.

Sensitive skin
The skin where the flaking is feels sensitive and sometimes burns when I wash my face (with the gentlest face wash available, mind you lol). It feels like sunburn. I've started to concentrate on those areas less when I wash my face, but it does hurt a little.

Once again, I have to thank my blackgirl-ness! A lot of people complain of redness/flushing during Accutane. I have a feeling that if I had fair skin, the sensitive areas around my mouth and nose would look irritated and red...but they're not! Just flaky, which is more than enough for me. Plus, I was out in the sun yesterday and it didn't seem to bother my skin at all :) So thank you, chocolate brown skin, for helping me out just a little!

Day 14 (the last photo shows the flakiness...EW)







UPDATE: I couldn't stand the flakiness on my chin and nose, so I went out and bought some gentle exfoliating face wash by Olay. I used it last night and liked it. It has round microbeads that are very gentle so they don't create irritating micro-tears like St. Ives Apricot scrub. I was very gentle when massaging it into my face and concentrated on the flaky areas. It didn't burn or irritate my skin at all. It didn't get rid of all the flakes, but it definitely helped. I also broke down and popped the huge pustules on my cheeks (I did it the "right" way with a hot washcloth, sterilized pin, and verrry gentle pressure, followed by some neosporin) so those are healing and look better. I'm starting to realize that even though I have a bunch of larger bumps, the rest of my skin is starting to look really healthy and nice. Maybe I can see the light at the end of the tunnel...?

Another UPDATE: My skin has been so up and down every day that I decided to take a few pics mid-week to show a particularly bad day. Remember, each of these bumps HURTS, itches, and is way uglier in person they they appear on screen.






and a particularly wonderful spot under my eyes...praying that my entire face is like this when this is over!

Week 2...Initial Breakout???

Its the middle of week 2 (day 10) and so far my Accutane treatment is going...okay. I'm pretty sure that I'm experiencing the initial breakout but it's not THE worst thing I've ever gone through...I have a similar quantity of blemishes but they are bigger and more inflamed. Let's hope it doesn't get any worse.

Changes to my Skin

My skin is still oily everyday and I continue to blot with oil absorbing sheets once or twice a day to reduce shine. I use either MAC Studio Fix Liquid or Bare Minerals Powder Foundation, neither of which cover everything but improve my overall skin tone. In the first few days, I started noticing small white heads popping up here and there, and on day 7 I broke out with several HUGE pustules and papules, mainly on my cheeks and jawline. Over the past few days, I've had 5 new large pustules on my left cheek, 3 on my right cheek, and 2-3 beneath my jawline, in addition some little ones here and there. Very embarrassing...I hate going to work and hanging out with friends knowing they are staring at my even-more-horrible-than-usual skin, but they seem to be resolving themselves quicker than usual so I'm trying not to worry too much. My skin is very soft and smooth everywhere else though, especially on my upper cheeks. No changes in my hyper-pigmentation.

Side effects
My side effects have been mild thus far, and let's just hope they stay that way:

Dry ass lips
Let me first say that my biggest pet peeve in life is dry, crusty, ashy ass lips. I can't stand them on myself or others. I just won't have it! So I've been really proactive in moisturizing my lips even more than usual (I'm addicted to lip balm as it is). On day 7, my normal Kiehls #1 Lip Balm was not cutting it anymore. My lips didn't LOOK ashy, but they FELT paper dry. I got some Aquaphor Healing Ointment and started using that every 30 mins or so. When I say that's the best lip balm ever, I'm not exaggerating. It's smooth, thin, and lasts forever. I love it and I'm totally hooked. It's really kept my lips from even THINKING about cracking or peeling.
p.s. I thank my black girl-ness for being totally prepared to lip gloss it up for the next 6 months! I've been training for this for years!

Dry/Sensitive Scalp
I have long, thick locs and have done my own hair for years. I washed my hair last weekend (Day 6) and noticed that my hair was sensitive to the hot water; I had to use much cooler water than usual. When I was twisting and corn-rowing my hair, it felt like I was tugging and yanking with all my might, and I really wasn't. In the last day or two, my scalp has been itching like crazy and last night I realized that....I have dandruff! I have never EVER had a flaky scalp so this is totally new. Putting some oil on my scalp has helped so far so I'll probably just have to do that more often than usual. I'm guessing that people who report hair thinning or loss were experiencing breakage from dryness...and I'm also guessing this would be more of an issue for people with chemically treated hair. As a natural girl who LOVES my hair, I'm crossing my fingers.

Dry eyes
I don't wear contacts, but my eyes have been mildly itchy and dry, especially in the evenings. I find myself rubbing the crap out of them at times. So, I've started using regular ole eye drops a few times a day - one drop in each eye - to moisturize my eye balls and keep my lids from itching. Seems to be working so far.

Fatigue
I've been pretty sleepy in the evenings, especially when I didn't get at least 8 hours of sleep the night before. So I've been falling asleep around 9:30pm - way early for a night-owl like me. I've been okay going through my regular routine with only a typical amount of soreness after the gym, so it's not serious.

Nausea
The first few days I took my pill with dinner but only swallowed it with a sip of juice or water. I felt nauseated for hours afterward. Then I learned you should take it with dinner AND an entire glass of water. Now that I've been doing that I've been okay.

So that's about it! I've continued to wash my face twice daily with Cetaphil Gentle Skin Cleanser. I moisturize in the morning with Neutrogena Oil-Free Moisture with SPF 15, and at night with Cetaphil Moisturizing Cream (I want to address the dry peeling before it even starts). I've been thirsty and dry-lipped enough to drink 8 or more cups of water a day so staying hydrated hasn't been too hard.

Check me out below! It's the end of the day so my skin is super gross and extra shiny. Plus my photos kinda suck...but as you can see, things are getting worse...

Day 6






Day 10






UPDATE: Last night I discovered that I have two pimples on my leg! Yes, my leg, people. They don't seem at all like bug bites or ingrown hairs. They are straight up white heads. Aside from being slightly grossed out, I am also quite fascinated...my leg though? I've never had significant body acne, and certainly not calf acne, so where those clogged pores are coming from I don't know. But I guess the Accutane really does force all the oil and bacteria out of your body no matter how obscure.

Finally! Week 1

Hey now!

I started this blog to document my experience taking Accutane. While considering whether to go through with this treatment, other peoples' videos and blogs were really helpful in my decision. As an African American woman, I haven't been able to find many Accutane videos or photo blogs by people of color, so I hope to also give other women of color with hyper-pigmentation an idea of what they may experience on Accutane.

So...I have finally started Accutane! I had to jump through a lot of hoops to get this medication. I have suffered from acne on and off since I was 12 years old (I'm 26 now) and although my skin has gone through a lot of changes over the years, the acne has always returned. As an adult with acne who has tried everything from the over-the-counter washes and creams to prescription topicals and antibiotics, I visited my new dermatologist knowing that my last option was Accutane. After looking over my skin and discussing my past treatments, my Derm quickly prescribed Accutane, did a pregnancy test, blood work, and signed me up for iPledge. I spent the 30-day waiting period watching others' Accutane journeys on Youtube and doing as much research about the drug that I could. Unfortunately, when I came back for my 2nd pregnancy test and prescription, there was a mix-up with my health insurance needing prior authorization to cover the drug and it took so long to resolve that I missed the 7-day window for filling my prescription. So...I had to wait two more weeks to take another pregnancy test and get my prescription. My health insurance STILL gave me a hard time about covering Accutane, and my doctor had to call and ARGUE with them to cover it, but I finally got it! YAY! Victory!

So today is Day 2 of my Accutane treatment. I am on the generic form, Claravis. The plan is 40 mg per day for the first month and 80 mg per day for the remaining 4-5 months. I've read a lot of other peoples' recommendations for products to use while on Accutane, but for now I'm sticking with what I'm used to until it becomes a problem. I'm using Cetaphil Gentle Skin Cleanser and Neutrogena Oil Free Moisture with SPF 15 for moisturizer (If my skin gets too dry for that, I'll probably try Cetaphil Moisturizing cream at night). I'm already addicted to lip balm and will stick with my Kiehls #1 Lip Balm until my lips prove too dry for it, in which case I'll probably try Aquaphor. I already use lotion morning and night and will stick with Aveeno Daily Moisturizing Lotion for the summer at least. I'm hoping that I won't get too dry, especially since I live in Atlanta and it's July, but I have no problem moisturizing like crazy if I do.

Yesterday and today, I've taken my pill with dinner but both days it made me slightly nauseous anyway :( Not too big of a deal though. Obviously I'm not seeing any changes yet, but I'm so excited to start seeing it work! I'm praying for a gentle initial breakout, especially since my Derm is starting me on a half dose and increasing in the second month, but ready for it to get worse before better cause I know that's what happens for most....

I'll be uploading photos for each weekly post to document my exact changes. You can see my starting point in the photos below. It just so happens that my skin looks better at the moment than it has in months. I realize it doesn't look too bad but it has definitely been way worse in the recent past...unfortunately I don't have photos of my skin at its worst. I'm sure my low quality camera doesn't help either. But to give you an idea, I have oily skin with lots of comedones on my cheeks, forehead and jawline, occasional pustules on my cheeks, enlarged pores, and lots of hyper-pigmentation from past breakouts.

So...I guess that's about i for now! Stay tuned.